Silence hurts. Even though the "practical no nonsense" you knows he is very busy, you are not that important to him, there is a million pound shitload going on that you don't know about, because even if you have revealed your darkest secrets to him, you really know shit about him. You also know in the deep recesses of your fevered brain that the guilt and complications are so huge and looming, he won't fuck up his life for you because you are not worth it. Silence hurts, still. Especially when, every single day for the past two weeks, the first thought that comes into consciousness as soon as you wake up is the last time you heard his voice, the moment it said: "Never talk about "always" when referring to me". Fuck everything to hell.