Have been joking around with my boyfriend about my recurring obsession with Chris Cornell. I love everything he has done in music, even the super glossy James Bond theme song. To me he is the most beautiful, gorgeous chunk of rocking eye candy to come out of Seattle and his classical Soundgarden era: no shirt, long short jeans, curly long hair, blue eyes and big black boots is the epitome of male perfection.
All this, though, is not enough to make me go out and buy his Audioslave records. BUY, no downloads, actually going into a record store, usually deserted these days, CD's organized alphabetically and easily accessible. What moved me for the past week is that, even though I have heard this song a hundred times before, I had never paid attention to the lyrics. So, on a whim I looked up the lyrics, and was floored and am currently going into a mimicry of depression. Thinking about the happiest times of my life, with Soundgarden and others serving as soundtrack. Poised on the start of my adult life, barely knowing what lay ahead and never imagining that my life would be so fucking unproductive as it is right now. One of the burdens of intelligence, or at least being the consistent top score at school, is the expectation that you should grow up and cure cancer, bring world peace or at least do something out of the ordinary. What do I have to show for myself? I am still making less than anyone with an associate degree would and am waiting on grown up brats who treat me like shit in a very guarded, politically correct, corporate way.
I have found many of my friends again, thanks to the Internet and Facebook, the feeling that they are my best friends forever has not faded one bit. I look back to that 1993 trip to El Yunque as the last time we were all together having fun. I wonder, what now. Coincidentally around that time I also met the Witch in art class, so she falls in that time warp that signifies youthful bliss in my conscious mind.
I dedicate this song to all of you who read this blog, that have shared with me even one beautiful moment no matter when I met you, a moment that time cruelly makes happen too fast to never be lived again:
Like a Stone
On a cobweb afternoon
in a room full of emptiness
by a freeway i confess
i was lost in the pages
of a book full of death
reading how we'll die alone
and if we're good we'll lay to rest
anywhere we want to go
(chorus)
in your house i long to be
room by room patiently
i'll wait for you there
like a stone i'll wait for you there
alone
on my deathbed i will pray
to the gods and the angels
like a pagan to anyone
who will take me to heaven
to a place i call
i was there so long ago
the sky was bruised
the wine was bled
and there you led me on
in your house i long to be
room by room patiently
i'll wait for you there
like a stone i'll wait for you there
alone
and on i read
until the day was gone
and i sat in regret
of all the things i've done
for all that i've blessed
and all that i've wronged
in dreams until my death
i will wander on
-Audioslave-
All this, though, is not enough to make me go out and buy his Audioslave records. BUY, no downloads, actually going into a record store, usually deserted these days, CD's organized alphabetically and easily accessible. What moved me for the past week is that, even though I have heard this song a hundred times before, I had never paid attention to the lyrics. So, on a whim I looked up the lyrics, and was floored and am currently going into a mimicry of depression. Thinking about the happiest times of my life, with Soundgarden and others serving as soundtrack. Poised on the start of my adult life, barely knowing what lay ahead and never imagining that my life would be so fucking unproductive as it is right now. One of the burdens of intelligence, or at least being the consistent top score at school, is the expectation that you should grow up and cure cancer, bring world peace or at least do something out of the ordinary. What do I have to show for myself? I am still making less than anyone with an associate degree would and am waiting on grown up brats who treat me like shit in a very guarded, politically correct, corporate way.
I have found many of my friends again, thanks to the Internet and Facebook, the feeling that they are my best friends forever has not faded one bit. I look back to that 1993 trip to El Yunque as the last time we were all together having fun. I wonder, what now. Coincidentally around that time I also met the Witch in art class, so she falls in that time warp that signifies youthful bliss in my conscious mind.
I dedicate this song to all of you who read this blog, that have shared with me even one beautiful moment no matter when I met you, a moment that time cruelly makes happen too fast to never be lived again:
Like a Stone
On a cobweb afternoon
in a room full of emptiness
by a freeway i confess
i was lost in the pages
of a book full of death
reading how we'll die alone
and if we're good we'll lay to rest
anywhere we want to go
(chorus)
in your house i long to be
room by room patiently
i'll wait for you there
like a stone i'll wait for you there
alone
on my deathbed i will pray
to the gods and the angels
like a pagan to anyone
who will take me to heaven
to a place i call
i was there so long ago
the sky was bruised
the wine was bled
and there you led me on
in your house i long to be
room by room patiently
i'll wait for you there
like a stone i'll wait for you there
alone
and on i read
until the day was gone
and i sat in regret
of all the things i've done
for all that i've blessed
and all that i've wronged
in dreams until my death
i will wander on
-Audioslave-
